Denver is a space.
The bare room I share with my brother and Rosie is a space.
The train I take to the city is a space.
These physical spaces and all of the other ones I have traveled to in the past half of a year make up only a small percentage of a whole. The true traveling, and meaningful change of existences takes place within. As many have seen in previous posts, and for those who are new, our footsteps have taken us to Denver for the time-being to stay a bit. For a green-soled traveler, this seems a bit different to me, an uneasy feeling sets in from the stillness.
I want to keep moving, to keep traveling a path. There has recently been an internal struggle with this concept. Just the other night, I spoke to a close friend about this just while catching up on each other’s ever-changing lives. She helped me to realize that there is a need for this stillness, or this rest period. Though, it may seem like I am not moving at the moment, she showed me that this can be viewed as another beneficial step to the “journey of sorts” that I began back in January of this year. I am still moving, still traveling, learning and transforming just the same. I move through non-physical spaces to dwell, and witness, while also taking in the physical nature of this new location. The funny part was, only a few years ago, much of my photography and collage had to do with this exact idea on physical versus non-physical spaces, and now here it is again, looking at me square in the face. Perhaps, like Eckhart Tolle says,
“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at this moment.”
So here I am, concerned about my lack of movement, when really, at this exact moment, I am encountering the experiences and travel that are necessary for me. Physical or non-physical does not really matter. The moment is here.
My friend also told me, “sometimes you need an undesired, strategic retreat after a single battle to successfully win the whole war. I found this both thrilling and comical at the same time, that she would compare my life to a war, while I strive to be so peaceful. Sometimes I do feel like I just stepped off of a battlefield in life, with all of the goings-on and exhausted feelings. I am in Denver, a new and beautiful city, to experience and travel throughout. To explore. I was originally so concerned that this time in Denver was a surrender, like I had given up on the travels. Some may still feel that way about it, but I sure don’t. It is all connected, and as I continually develop through this experience and the next, I will use this moment in Denver as an incubation, to digest, to grow, to expand and push further on my “journey of sorts.”
My travels are not over with. This is merely the beginning for us “road beats.” The next chapter and transition I have been speaking of is taking place as I write, and as I seek out connections with others in this great state of Colorado, and travel throughout it. It is my hope that connecting with this community will bring more insights to share with you and allow you to better understand why it is I do not fall into the stale drumbeat of society’s accepted norms. Look up the word “hegemony” or more specifically, “cultural hegemony.” This may give you a better idea of the limits that people hold over their own lives and how those limits can be broken.
Thank you all so much for your support, for following the blog, and for allowing me to share with you what it is I do in life. I urge you to keep an eye on where these next few weeks and months take me for an awesome summer in CO, and to also set out on your own journeys. This moment is.