a journey of sorts…

"Rather than love, than money, than faith, than fame, than fairness, give me truth." – HDT

Month: June, 2013

A different kind of travel through non-physical spaces.

Denver is a space.
The bare room I share with my brother and Rosie is a space.
The train I take to the city is a space.

These physical spaces and all of the other ones I have traveled to in the past half of a year make up only a small percentage of a whole. The true traveling, and meaningful change of existences takes place within. As many have seen in previous posts, and for those who are new, our footsteps have taken us to Denver for the time-being to stay a bit. For a green-soled traveler, this seems a bit different to me, an uneasy feeling sets in from the stillness.

I want to keep moving, to keep traveling a path. There has recently been an internal struggle with this concept. Just the other night, I spoke to a close friend about this just while catching up on each other’s ever-changing lives. She helped me to realize that there is a need for this stillness, or this rest period. Though, it may seem like I am not moving at the moment, she showed me that this can be viewed as another beneficial step to the “journey of sorts” that I began back in January of this year. I am still moving, still traveling, learning and transforming just the same. I move through non-physical spaces to dwell, and witness, while also taking in the physical nature of this new location. The funny part was, only a few years ago, much of my photography and collage had to do with this exact idea on physical versus non-physical spaces, and now here it is again, looking at me square in the face. Perhaps, like Eckhart Tolle says,

“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at this moment.”

So here I am, concerned about my lack of movement, when really, at this exact moment, I am encountering the experiences and travel that are necessary for me. Physical or non-physical does not really matter. The moment is here.

My friend also told me, “sometimes you need an undesired, strategic retreat after a single battle to successfully win the whole war. I found this both thrilling and comical at the same time, that she would compare my life to a war, while I strive to be so peaceful. Sometimes I do feel like I just stepped off of a battlefield in life, with all of the goings-on and exhausted feelings. I am in Denver, a new and beautiful city, to experience and travel throughout. To explore. I was originally so concerned that this time in Denver was a surrender, like I had given up on the travels. Some may still feel that way about it, but I sure don’t. It is all connected, and as I continually develop through this experience and the next, I will use this moment in Denver as an incubation, to digest, to grow, to expand and push further on my “journey of sorts.”

My travels are not over with. This is merely the beginning for us “road beats.” The next chapter and transition I have been speaking of is taking place as I write, and as I seek out connections with others in this great state of Colorado, and travel throughout it. It is my hope that connecting with this community will bring more insights to share with you and allow you to better understand why it is I do not fall into the stale drumbeat of society’s accepted norms. Look up the word “hegemony” or more specifically, “cultural hegemony.” This may give you a better idea of the limits that people hold over their own lives and how those limits can be broken.

Thank you all so much for your support, for following the blog, and for allowing me to share with you what it is I do in life. I urge you to keep an eye on where these next few weeks and months take me for an awesome summer in CO, and to also set out on your own journeys. This moment is.

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a train to the city in Denver

On the Denver street.

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Anonymous Denver street art from this past weekend.

A subtle return.

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The road back to Denver. Adam and I returned a few weeks back and I wanted you to have a glimpse of what we saw.

Go.

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Please. Go and do. I will not judge. Just as I hope you will not.

Courtesy of friends at The Mind Unleashed and Earth. We are one.

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They had wings

Thanks for this one Devan.

Posed and Written

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He leans on wings that he does not use.

Resting back on these folded things that he dare not expose.

He tried them out once, and their span covered such a space, and set off such a gust that it shook him.

Startled to his core by their measure of strength.

By the distance of their reach.

And he marveled at the strength in his own shoulders to bear the weight of such a thing.

But put them away for fear of being noticed – of being different.

He walked around hunched over, appearing to hold some great burden – cloaked in plain clothes.

And all of the rest where he lived, walked with their burdens.

Burdens carried on strong backs.

Cowering underneath the greatness that they too carried.

Under wings that they dared not show.

If only one of them would have shared what they feared, they’d all be…

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Forget the penny. I’d gladly give a dime for her thoughts.

My posts have become a bit more scarce in the recent days. Not only on here but within my journal. This is an internal battle for me because every time I put off writing and do not do it, I miss out on that opportunity to share my thoughts and experiences. In order to redeem myself and break this lull of non-existent writing, I thought I’d send out a kudos to someone.

I’ve recently, in the past couple of weeks, become acquainted with a very inspiring and intelligent individual. Dyan. She was another reader, across the ocean of other bloggers, who happened across my pages, of all others. She has become a friend to me through the few talks we’ve had. Her writings and coaching are an amazing quality she uses to help others. She speaks of finding dimes in her post, and how they’re like signs throughout the day. The original blog post is here.

“What I’ve learned from finding the dimes is that if we follow those little ideas, signposts, feelings and inspirations that flow through our lives – they can lead us to amazing places. And they are great reminders to take a moment and a breath.” – Dyan

It’s in noticing and beholding those little things, that we can start to piece together a sort of path of our own. A path of happy existence, as opposed to constantly wanting this and needing that. The past couple of weeks have been without a doubt, some of the most mysterious, trying, and difficult on the both of us brothers. It seemed as if these times were causing a tension that was not necessary or comfortable. As soon as I take a step back from all of this worry over trivial matters though, and just take a look at the little things in life that matter most, I find that tension melting away. Innocence, joy, happiness. Forget weighing, judging, who’s ahead of whom in this life, trying to make sure the score’s even for everyone and that you’re getting your “just desserts.”

I seem to get drawn into these behaviors a lot so it’s up to me to remind myself to follow those little signposts and markers. I’m not sure our species is in a constant state of competition, or the fact that there’s always someone we feel we need to one up or be better than. Perhaps we were simply misled from the start. A game of survival turned into a game of screw over your neighbor so you can have the most money, the most food, the most whatever. Maybe my life is here to create a rift in that state of being for others to take notice. Do not think I hold myself above others from my previous statement though, since I know I fall into these competitive and irresponsible behaviors the same as the rest of our species, but I feel that we are wrong. I feel that there should be a peace, not a constant state of jealousy, judgement and ruin. So here I am, back on the writing gig after a couple of weeks trying to catch my breath from a constant state of motion, and spotting my own signposts to follow wherever I can. I feel this is all something we can do a little more of, and offer up our own lessons learned as a way of helping others. Not necessarily by preaching it to their faces, because that surely will not get them to listen, but instead, go out and make an example. Show a different way.

I speak of this now, from Denver where our travels have landed us several times before. It seems the mountainous land and crisp air in this mile-high city have got a hold on us, and we will stay to explore it further. I will make it back to California someday soon. I don’t consider this an end of any traveling, but merely a stepping stone as we grow in this city and prepare to move on again. I hope you will continue to follow us as we make our mark on this city and the next.

Thanks so much to you, Dyan. Follow your “dimes” as I look out for my own. Thank you for the mention on your original blog post as well and keep in touch. To everyone else, I am pressing forward with this writing in hopes I can continue to provide you with what you want to learn. If you have any thoughts or comments on your mind, or even a question about goings-on in your own lives, I am an open ear and a soul with a beating heart just like yours. Please get a hold of me and I’d be happy to talk.

Lastly, let me leave you with this quote from an author who I’m sure you’ve heard of if you follow my posts, but if not, I urge you to look into.

“Give up waiting as a state of mind. When you catch yourself slipping into waiting…snap out of it. Come into the present moment. Just be and enjoy being.” – Eckhart Tolle.

 

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